Why do we miss those who betrayed us?

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Life happens. And unfortunately, almost every one of us encounters betrayal in one form or another. But we are completely unprepared for the fact that we.. miss the person who has not treated us in the best manner. Why does it happen? He/she did this to me… I am of sound mind – why do I miss them? I should hate them or be angry – this would be normal! But no… Unexpected longing puzzles us and we can’t… understand why we feel like this.

Irini’s friend was going out with her boyfriend behind her back. This young man was a recent acquaintance and the fact that he acted like this was easy to get over. Irini broke up with him and forgot him. But her friend… They have been friends for 8 years and were quite close. It was not easy to deal with her betrayal. It has been several months already but Irini still feels sadness. She realized that she is… missing her friend, even though she didn’t want to admit it. Irini’s mother, with whom she shared her feelings, was indignant – “What do you mean sadness? What is there to be sad about?”

But in our psyche, everything is not so simple. Betrayal is possible only on the part of very close people. An unfamiliar person or a passer-by from a bus stop or a queue at the checkout counter cannot betray.

For the betrayal to take place, a person must be in a very close zone, and they have the right to be there – the keys of trust were issued by us.

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Experiencing betrayal, first of all, we find ourselves wounded by the fact that some of our hopes for the future with this person, that they will love us and we will be happy together – are not destined to come true. And this is a great loss – a huge one! Nothing is more painful than the collapse of one’s aspirations.

We paint ourselves a portrait of this person as we see them. The depicted image does not always correspond to reality, but we are artists in our soul – we see it this way! And after something has not come true, we feel inside for a long time what we think could have been – and the person we trusted ruined everything…

We fell longing for those people whom we have brought close to ourselves, whom we have fallen in love with. We miss an image that does not want to fade, despite the clear indications that the picture does not correspond to reality.

Beloved people do not cease to be loved right away, this does not happen… We hold inside for a long time what we have lost, and we are infinitely sorry that this happened. Sadness, in this case, is quite justified, isn’t it?

It will pass. The mourning period does not last forever, but it cannot be skipped. Everything has its time.


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