Loneliness is a difficult state of mind. Sometimes it appears even if there are people nearby.
Today we will talk about the loneliness caused by the absence of relationships.
These are a few things you can tell yourself to improve your condition and move on from destructive tendencies to the constructive solution of the problem.
1. “Currently, I am free“
Do you feel the difference between freedom and loneliness? Freedom is a choice, while loneliness is enforced. This enforced state is rather sad.
It’s better to do everything because you strive for something better rather than because you want to escape something bad.
A free person looks for good, fulfilling, joyful relationships, while a lonely person is ready for anything that would fill the void in their heart.
2. “It’s time to get to know yourself better“
Consider this period a chance to find out more about yourself. Lonely people often try to fill the hole in their heart by some other person. However, this has never led to anything good.
3. “It’s only temporary“
The time of loneliness is not eternal, it will pass as well. Maybe that’s what you actually need right now for one reason or another. The faster you deal with the cause, the faster your relationship will come.
4. “I am alright“
Even if you don’t mind not having a partner right now, people around you might often rub salt into your wound. Some are simply tactless, others enjoy hurting people like this. “How come you’re still alone?” “watch it, or you’ll always be alone because of your constant working.” Do not fall for this provocation, remind yourself that you are fine. It is important.
5. “I do not run away from loneliness, I accept it as a chapter of my life“
Beating fear means accepting the obvious and trying to understand what this time of your life is all about for you. Is it about loving yourself? Is it about taking a break from social life? Is it about being happier without relationships? Is it about still feeling sad over the past relationship? Maybe you need to wait a little before you’ll be ready to let something new into your life?
6. “Do I have the resources to share my warmth with anyone other than me?“
This is a very important question. Any relationship is a balance of giving and taking. If you have nothing to give right now for one reason or another, maybe it’s just not a good time?
7. “Do I really want to be in a relationship?“
Or does my mum want that (because it’s about time she got grandchildren!), or my granny (everyone else has great-grandchildren by now!), or my friends (look at them, looking all smug with rings on their fingers!), or my ego (why should I be different?)? Once again, society might try to control you and your choices, but you should try not to give in to it. After all, you should have a better reason for being in a relationship.